Telling Our Truth
A friend says she thinks interest in memoir is so intense because current fiction fails to tell us much about the world we’re living in. She blames a narrow range of book choices, and says, as we look to books for answers and understanding, memoir fills the gap.
I think about this. There is certainly an appetite to tell our stories. Of the 25-30 writers who attend our RWC meetings, a good third have either written or are writing a memoir. Our September session is devoted to the topic and we’ve already got people eager to sign up.
I think we love to read about other people's lives to see how they think and act differently in circumstances we’ve not encountered/endured/enjoyed. We also love to see ourselves in others’ stories.
I’ve always read biography and memoir to escape into another person’s existence. And now I love to listen. There’s something special about hearing an author read their own story in audio format. I revel in the voice.
I’ve just started listening to Arrangements in Blue by Amy Key. Cindy, our RWC co-founder and memoirist, recommended it. Amy’s book is about arriving in your forties and finding you’re single. I’m intrigued, but I hesitate before I download. I’m 49, unmarried and, like many of my female friends of a similar age and partnership status, often wonder how I got to this place without a plus-one and family of my own. But I don’t want to read another book/article/tweet about what I need to do to “fix” myself to find romantic love; how to love myself more (…shudder); or, how I’m actually living my best life as a single woman approaching middle age. I don’t want to be a market segment.
But, I have questions and theories. Does Amy have the same? I begin to listen, ready to poke stop if the book gets cheesy, cringy, or self-helpy, but most of all too close to the bone, too shaming. I realise I’m scared of being seen, and what that might reveal about me
Amy is a poet, her voice is lyrical, she has a tale to tell. My fear of being exposed turns into soft recognition. I’m drawn into her story. Some parts I listen to multiple times, filtering her thoughts through my own experience. Amy’s telling a tale I know well in a way that’s particular to her. But I know that story too.
And this, I think, is the power of memoir, and fiction: the writing feels personal, it tells us about ourselves and in doing so, brings us together. Seen in another, we know the story is not just about us. We are not alone.